Melissa Sauer, Melissa L. Sauer, Attorney at Law Reviews
Apr 4, 2015
Sorry in advance this is a book.
My nightmare dealing with Melissa Sauer started in April 2013.
For entire first 5 years of my daughter's life, I was the primary parent who shared joint legal with my ex when I left him in 2009. My daughter lived with me full time and 'dad' only wanted the bare minimum parenting time. I actually took him to court after we separated to enforce more parenting time as our than 2 year old daughter was missing her daddy. He worked third shift and refused to help out during the day.
Fast forward to January 2013 when I made the conscious decision to leave a bad relationship with my boyfriend of 3 years with my 2nd daughter (1 1/2 years old at this time) father. My family lives 3 hours away in Northern Indiana. Being a single mom of two and full time student, I felt it was beneficial to have all of the family support while we-adapted our lives. (again, my older daughter's dad still had bare minimum parenting time... I was the primary and sole provider for her, exception of his measly $36/week support). I was the parent that left work when she was sick at school. I was the parent that provided 100% of her extracurricular activities. I was the parent that put shoes on her feet, clothes on her back and took care of my house with the exception of his $36 bux. I took her to family counseling to ensure as a newly single mom I was doing everything right, for her.
While I was making the transition to Northern Indiana, my ex and I agreed as a temporarysolution to keep my daughter in the same school, she would stay with him (Important to note: Not HIM at night, but the babysitter where my daughter would sleep on a couch...) enrolled her into school in Northern Indiana and found a place to live. About 6 weeks later, I found a house 1 block from my parents and began the process of school enrollment. Initially, we were getting along pretty good until my ex started playing mind games indicating "how about we just wait until she is out of school here, in May" and really manipulating the situation.
In April he blind sided me by hiring an attorney and filed for FULL Custody. A "man" who wrote into the courts in 2010 to ask for LESS parenting time. A "man" who would never take on extra parenting time when I needed to work late, or leave town for business. A "man" who never spent more than his $36 to take care of her needs. Now he wants FULL CUSTODY of a child that has been with her mommy since day one??? The parent that tucked her in all but 2 nights a week because of his beloved third shift job. He only wanted me to have the minimum, what he feels he was "given" - every other weekend. (news flash, you chose that schedule, buddy)
In complete and utter shock, I immediately sought legal representation. Three out of 5 attorneys told me I needed to go get her with my current court order in hand, no questions asked. So mother's day weekend when my ex was trying to cut my Sunday Mother's Day time, I took her out of school where she was a kindergartner and brought her to Northern Indiana to be back where she belonged, with her mommy.
I receive a nastygram from his attorney requesting an emergency custody hearing if I didn't return my daughter. This is where the wonderful (sarcasm) experience with Ms. Sauer began.
My attorney advised I immediately contact Melissa and start communicating with her in early June - so I did. I drove 3 hours to meet her, in her office, during her time that she scheduled. I was very emotional, as any normal mother in these circumstances would be. My daughter was put right in the middle, being taken out of everything she has ever known - her mommy, little sister and family. Of course I was bitter toward my ex and visibly upset, crying and in some cases couldn't speak. But I pulled through, sucked it up and went. I tried to be as open as possible, even when it was difficult. This was absolutely the hardest thing of my life.
Little did I know, Melissa already had her mind made up about the custody and well being of my daughter. She emailed my attorney the following statement:
From: Melissa Sauer
Sent: Monday, June 24, 2013 5:49 PM
To: "My Attorney"
Subject: RE: Newsletter
I can say with a large amount of confidence that I will recommend a change in custody if Mom does not move back. Dad has informed me that he still wishes to push for custody even if she does move back. That is going to be a harder decision for me to make and I do not know at this point what that recommendation would be. I will try and keep you updated and you are always welcome to call if you want to discuss the matter in further detail.
Have a good night.
Melissa
Are you kidding me???? You're going to recommend a change in custody, where my daughter will end up sleeping on a babysitter's COUCH, where 10's of other kids sit their butts on, sleep, vomit on, in someone other than her mother's home where she has her OWN BED, her MOTHER, her sister - NORMALCY.
She hardly speaks to my "witnesses" - takes everything I say and completely twists it, completely fails to see the nasty, condescending, manipulative, degrading side of my ex but wants to elaborate on minimal facts of he/said-she/said and information that was many years OLD vs CURRENT CIRCUMSTANCES.
Obviously, Melissa is not a mother and doesn't listen to what my daughter had requested during their short little visit. My daughter was very clear and vocal about what she wanted. She wanted her MOM!
So, knowing Ms. Sauer's mind is made up, I make the effort to move back. This made it extremely difficult as I was not prepared to live without family support near me, change jobs, find a place to live. And as Melissa had already indicated, it wouldn't have mattered anyway - my ex was determined to fight me regardless. I failed. Afterall, there was a reason I moved away in the first place!
The day of the hearing in October 2013, when my entire world came crashing down courtesy of Ms. Sauer's "recommendation“ of what SHE felt the best interest of my daughter. My daughter had been in the same school district all 2 years of her life where she had the same friends (I guess kindergarten/1st grade friends make or break the rest of your life.....)Where the babysitter had been involved for a majority of my daughter's life, therefore that made her kids "like family" to my daughter. She also used my previous (again, PREVIOUS meaning I left.....) relationship with my 2nd daughter's father as part of her reasoning for now taking my custody away from me. She also used facts such as my daughter told her she no longer feels uncomfortable sleeping on a couch or the floor at the babysitter's and doesn't "feel sad" staying with the babysitter over night. *So I guess it's just healthy and okay to take a kid away from their mom, their bed and let them sleep on a couch or the floor..... because she got use to sleeping on the floor????? Even after she said she wants to be with her mom???? Hello!! Were you evening listening???
GAL's opinions completely contradicted themselves throughout the entire report. Not only does she recommend my daughter go sleep on the couch somewhere, but I only get every other weekend regardless of my wishes to get every weekend, holidays, breaks from school etc, basically allowing me even LESS time than my ex - the > 18% dad was getting. There are crackheads, recovering addicts, parents who don't take care of their kids getting more parenting time than that while I have never been on drugs or an addict. I have a career, education &PROOF, solid evidence that I have been my daughter's primary parent and care taker and completely ROCKED at doing just that! In her opinion, because I was stressed out and didn’t visit my counselor daily or stay with the same mentally abusive person or kiss my ex’s butt, I’m unable to be a parent……
Did I mention the b.s. outrageous bill Ms. Sauer so kindly sent in addition to the $500 up front fees? In the tune of a couple extra thousand dollars for her "services". She was definitely NO service to my family or my daughter, whatsoever. She may have "serviced" my ex. But that was it. She claims she did SO much extra work on my case, but since she had her mind made up from the jump, I don't see how she possibly could have worked so much..........
My mom ended up writing a grievance to the Indiana State Bar against this so-called "GAL" for the emotional destruction of my daughter and I which basically nearly resulted in demolition of our mother/daughter relationship.
Fast Forward to January 2014: I come back to the area my ex lives, so graciously move 5 minutes away from him (you're welcome ex), I get back to my AWESOME career, continue my MBA, while continuing to fight for my daughter. My new attorney requested Melissa be removed from the case due to her biased opinion and fallacious evidence.
THANK GOD for someone who actually listens. The Judge DID grant her to be removed. She tried to stay involved, arguing that she had so much knowledge in the case and despite my mom's grievance, she wanted the chance for my mom and I to explain why we felt that way. (Um, how about because you completely wrecked our lives, screwed up my daughter's emotional well being and are BIASED. Not to mention you are NOT a parent, so how can you possibly practice advocating for children when you know nothing about them???)
The new GAL was AMAZING. She DID take the time to come to my home to see with her two eyes that I live in a beautiful, nice, well established home SAFE and FIT for my children. She DID take the time to actually speak to and listen to my witnesses and to listen to me. She DID take the time to actually sit and speak to my daughter. The new GAL was fair to both my ex and I and explained details of her reason for her decisions. The new GAL saw right through my ex and his ridiculous, condescending, alienation and mind games.
Fast Forward to now, April 2015: I went back to court without an attorney and still won even more time with my daughter. Courtesy of Ms. Sauer's "wonderful" advice, I still live 5 min from my ex and am building a new home even closer to him (again, you're welcome ex....)while my ex still continues to fight me for more time, again back to the games of trying to alienate my daughter... same ole. The Judge has been wonderful and FAIR. My daughter is with each of us 50/50 and is as happy as ever. While we miss our family and grandparents/cousins/aunts/uncles TREMENDOUSLY, this was my compromise and had Ms. Sauer not had such a bad attitude since the beginning, she would have understood that I would do ANYTHING and have done ANYTHING for my daughter.
Melissa Sauer needs to be impeached from Hendricks County and practicing as a GAL. In my community support group, I have met more than one family now with similar experiences as mine of Melissa's ridiculous biased opinions with unsubstantial evidence. She was rude, incompetent and her billing practices were outrageous and totally unnecessary. To sum it up: waste of money and doesn't care about the kids. Unless you have unlimited funding to support this ignorance to the judicial system, then you probably will have the same luck because she IS better than us parents (rolling eyes)
Melissa Sauer, Melissa L. Sauer, Attorney at Law Reviews
Sorry in advance this is a book.
My nightmare dealing with Melissa Sauer started in April 2013.
For entire first 5 years of my daughter's life, I was the primary parent who shared joint legal with my ex when I left him in 2009. My daughter lived with me full time and 'dad' only wanted the bare minimum parenting time. I actually took him to court after we separated to enforce more parenting time as our than 2 year old daughter was missing her daddy. He worked third shift and refused to help out during the day.
Fast forward to January 2013 when I made the conscious decision to leave a bad relationship with my boyfriend of 3 years with my 2nd daughter (1 1/2 years old at this time) father. My family lives 3 hours away in Northern Indiana. Being a single mom of two and full time student, I felt it was beneficial to have all of the family support while we-adapted our lives. (again, my older daughter's dad still had bare minimum parenting time... I was the primary and sole provider for her, exception of his measly $36/week support). I was the parent that left work when she was sick at school. I was the parent that provided 100% of her extracurricular activities. I was the parent that put shoes on her feet, clothes on her back and took care of my house with the exception of his $36 bux. I took her to family counseling to ensure as a newly single mom I was doing everything right, for her.
While I was making the transition to Northern Indiana, my ex and I agreed as a temporarysolution to keep my daughter in the same school, she would stay with him (Important to note: Not HIM at night, but the babysitter where my daughter would sleep on a couch...) enrolled her into school in Northern Indiana and found a place to live. About 6 weeks later, I found a house 1 block from my parents and began the process of school enrollment. Initially, we were getting along pretty good until my ex started playing mind games indicating "how about we just wait until she is out of school here, in May" and really manipulating the situation.
In April he blind sided me by hiring an attorney and filed for FULL Custody. A "man" who wrote into the courts in 2010 to ask for LESS parenting time. A "man" who would never take on extra parenting time when I needed to work late, or leave town for business. A "man" who never spent more than his $36 to take care of her needs. Now he wants FULL CUSTODY of a child that has been with her mommy since day one??? The parent that tucked her in all but 2 nights a week because of his beloved third shift job. He only wanted me to have the minimum, what he feels he was "given" - every other weekend. (news flash, you chose that schedule, buddy)
In complete and utter shock, I immediately sought legal representation. Three out of 5 attorneys told me I needed to go get her with my current court order in hand, no questions asked. So mother's day weekend when my ex was trying to cut my Sunday Mother's Day time, I took her out of school where she was a kindergartner and brought her to Northern Indiana to be back where she belonged, with her mommy.
I receive a nastygram from his attorney requesting an emergency custody hearing if I didn't return my daughter. This is where the wonderful (sarcasm) experience with Ms. Sauer began.
My attorney advised I immediately contact Melissa and start communicating with her in early June - so I did. I drove 3 hours to meet her, in her office, during her time that she scheduled. I was very emotional, as any normal mother in these circumstances would be. My daughter was put right in the middle, being taken out of everything she has ever known - her mommy, little sister and family. Of course I was bitter toward my ex and visibly upset, crying and in some cases couldn't speak. But I pulled through, sucked it up and went. I tried to be as open as possible, even when it was difficult. This was absolutely the hardest thing of my life.
Little did I know, Melissa already had her mind made up about the custody and well being of my daughter. She emailed my attorney the following statement:
From: Melissa Sauer
Sent: Monday, June 24, 2013 5:49 PM
To: "My Attorney"
Subject: RE: Newsletter
I can say with a large amount of confidence that I will recommend a change in custody if Mom does not move back. Dad has informed me that he still wishes to push for custody even if she does move back. That is going to be a harder decision for me to make and I do not know at this point what that recommendation would be. I will try and keep you updated and you are always welcome to call if you want to discuss the matter in further detail.
Have a good night.
Melissa
Are you kidding me???? You're going to recommend a change in custody, where my daughter will end up sleeping on a babysitter's COUCH, where 10's of other kids sit their butts on, sleep, vomit on, in someone other than her mother's home where she has her OWN BED, her MOTHER, her sister - NORMALCY.
She hardly speaks to my "witnesses" - takes everything I say and completely twists it, completely fails to see the nasty, condescending, manipulative, degrading side of my ex but wants to elaborate on minimal facts of he/said-she/said and information that was many years OLD vs CURRENT CIRCUMSTANCES.
Obviously, Melissa is not a mother and doesn't listen to what my daughter had requested during their short little visit. My daughter was very clear and vocal about what she wanted. She wanted her MOM!
So, knowing Ms. Sauer's mind is made up, I make the effort to move back. This made it extremely difficult as I was not prepared to live without family support near me, change jobs, find a place to live. And as Melissa had already indicated, it wouldn't have mattered anyway - my ex was determined to fight me regardless. I failed. Afterall, there was a reason I moved away in the first place!
The day of the hearing in October 2013, when my entire world came crashing down courtesy of Ms. Sauer's "recommendation“ of what SHE felt the best interest of my daughter. My daughter had been in the same school district all 2 years of her life where she had the same friends (I guess kindergarten/1st grade friends make or break the rest of your life.....)Where the babysitter had been involved for a majority of my daughter's life, therefore that made her kids "like family" to my daughter. She also used my previous (again, PREVIOUS meaning I left.....) relationship with my 2nd daughter's father as part of her reasoning for now taking my custody away from me. She also used facts such as my daughter told her she no longer feels uncomfortable sleeping on a couch or the floor at the babysitter's and doesn't "feel sad" staying with the babysitter over night. *So I guess it's just healthy and okay to take a kid away from their mom, their bed and let them sleep on a couch or the floor..... because she got use to sleeping on the floor????? Even after she said she wants to be with her mom???? Hello!! Were you evening listening???
GAL's opinions completely contradicted themselves throughout the entire report. Not only does she recommend my daughter go sleep on the couch somewhere, but I only get every other weekend regardless of my wishes to get every weekend, holidays, breaks from school etc, basically allowing me even LESS time than my ex - the > 18% dad was getting. There are crackheads, recovering addicts, parents who don't take care of their kids getting more parenting time than that while I have never been on drugs or an addict. I have a career, education &PROOF, solid evidence that I have been my daughter's primary parent and care taker and completely ROCKED at doing just that! In her opinion, because I was stressed out and didn’t visit my counselor daily or stay with the same mentally abusive person or kiss my ex’s butt, I’m unable to be a parent……
Did I mention the b.s. outrageous bill Ms. Sauer so kindly sent in addition to the $500 up front fees? In the tune of a couple extra thousand dollars for her "services". She was definitely NO service to my family or my daughter, whatsoever. She may have "serviced" my ex. But that was it. She claims she did SO much extra work on my case, but since she had her mind made up from the jump, I don't see how she possibly could have worked so much..........
My mom ended up writing a grievance to the Indiana State Bar against this so-called "GAL" for the emotional destruction of my daughter and I which basically nearly resulted in demolition of our mother/daughter relationship.
Fast Forward to January 2014: I come back to the area my ex lives, so graciously move 5 minutes away from him (you're welcome ex), I get back to my AWESOME career, continue my MBA, while continuing to fight for my daughter. My new attorney requested Melissa be removed from the case due to her biased opinion and fallacious evidence.
THANK GOD for someone who actually listens. The Judge DID grant her to be removed. She tried to stay involved, arguing that she had so much knowledge in the case and despite my mom's grievance, she wanted the chance for my mom and I to explain why we felt that way. (Um, how about because you completely wrecked our lives, screwed up my daughter's emotional well being and are BIASED. Not to mention you are NOT a parent, so how can you possibly practice advocating for children when you know nothing about them???)
The new GAL was AMAZING. She DID take the time to come to my home to see with her two eyes that I live in a beautiful, nice, well established home SAFE and FIT for my children. She DID take the time to actually speak to and listen to my witnesses and to listen to me. She DID take the time to actually sit and speak to my daughter. The new GAL was fair to both my ex and I and explained details of her reason for her decisions. The new GAL saw right through my ex and his ridiculous, condescending, alienation and mind games.
Fast Forward to now, April 2015: I went back to court without an attorney and still won even more time with my daughter. Courtesy of Ms. Sauer's "wonderful" advice, I still live 5 min from my ex and am building a new home even closer to him (again, you're welcome ex....)while my ex still continues to fight me for more time, again back to the games of trying to alienate my daughter... same ole. The Judge has been wonderful and FAIR. My daughter is with each of us 50/50 and is as happy as ever. While we miss our family and grandparents/cousins/aunts/uncles TREMENDOUSLY, this was my compromise and had Ms. Sauer not had such a bad attitude since the beginning, she would have understood that I would do ANYTHING and have done ANYTHING for my daughter.
Melissa Sauer needs to be impeached from Hendricks County and practicing as a GAL. In my community support group, I have met more than one family now with similar experiences as mine of Melissa's ridiculous biased opinions with unsubstantial evidence. She was rude, incompetent and her billing practices were outrageous and totally unnecessary. To sum it up: waste of money and doesn't care about the kids. Unless you have unlimited funding to support this ignorance to the judicial system, then you probably will have the same luck because she IS better than us parents (rolling eyes)